Monthly Archives: January 2005

It was an eventful week. Jack had a birthday, for one, but actually not “for one,” as he seems to have leveraged his birth day into spanning an entire Birth Week. Last Monday night he said, “It’s my birthday this … Continue reading →

Good morning, I’m humorless and resentful, as are many moms who blog. We overscrutinize our children’s every excretion and whore out adorable anecdotes about them just to get attention for ourselves! Also, you may have noticed, I have a name. … Continue reading →

So for some reason I decided that it was time Jackson knew a joke. Me: Okay, when I say “knock knock” you say “who’s there?” Jackson: Who’s there? Me: Good. Knock knock. Jackson: (silence) Me: Now you say “who’s there?” … Continue reading →

We’d needed them for years. A bowl had shattered; a salad plate bit the dust. Eating off a cracked plate isn’t so bad, although I’m sure my mother would have something to say about the bacteria growing in that blackened … Continue reading →

Overhead by Jack on the bike path: “. . . so when I get bored I sit on my hands until they’re numb, and then when I jerk off it feels like someone else is doing it. I call it … Continue reading →

It seems that the people set O.J. free so that he could enjoy running around the municiple golf courses of L.A. frightening Australian tourists.

A while back I was out having dinner with Jack and my boss and his domestic fella and their girlfriend, T. T is sixty or so, with lots of elegant gray hair, and to powerful things she brings an immense … Continue reading →

Like most parents, it seems, we teach our three-year-old son lines from The Godfather. For example, sometimes Jackson forgets to say “please.” Imagine! So, one day Jackson wanted some gum or something and Jack started coaching him. “Say please,” said … Continue reading →

The first recipient of Jackson’s “Food for Skateboarders” program. Our motto is “Matching Clif Bars with Stoked Individuals Since 2005.” This man ate an entire Caramel Apple Cobbler.

Last weekend Jack needed some alone time so I said I’d take Jackson out for awhile. Because he didn’t want Jackson to get all hyped up about it, Jack asked me, “What time is F-A-T A-L-B-E-R-T playing?” and I sat … Continue reading →