Well, we've been sick, that's for sure
After watching Jack buckle under a horrible bronchial infection and flu last week it only served me right that after several days of sort of thinking he must exaggerating how bad it was (Really, an icepick? In your eardrum? Huh.), I would get it. That's some ancient Greek payback, right there. And a little extra for making him drive himself to the doctor. Granted, Jack's one of the tougher models of human being, he didn't even ask me to take him, he just walked out the door with his truck keys in his hand and a grim look on his face, but still.
The second time he went to the doctor (the first round of antibiotics was too WEAK) I was actually bundled up on the couch with Jackson, who'd come down with a fever, but I'm pretty sure at that point Jack got in his truck armed with nothing but a broken aspirin bottle and a steely gaze and the truck drove itself to Urgent Care.
Anyway, I shouldn't have been surprised when I woke up on the couch at 3:00 in the morning (Jackson gets super clingy when he's sick so I'd been sleeping on the couch with him and letting Jack bundle up and sweat it out in our bed) my first thought was, "Gee, I haven't felt this bad since I was in labor."
You need no more detail than that, gentle reader. I'm coming through it pretty quickly, which leads me to believe that I just got a half dose while Jack must have felt like someone had catapulted a hippo at him, and which led me to apologize (hoarsely, in a sweaty bath robe, with matted hair) for not having been as nice to him when he was sick as he was being to me. Sometimes I get so self-involved I want to shoot myself. Which, ironically, would only make matters worse.
When I was little my mom would put menthol rub on my chest when I was sick but without telling me exactly how that was going to help. (I think my constant childhood frustration with bad information is what turned me into such a relentless explainer.) Then a month ago Jackson's friend Sophie spent the night and I found that her mom, the brilliant Jennifer, had sent along a jar of vapor rub in Sophie's bag. She asked me to rub it on Sophie's feet and then put some socks on her before she went to sleep and that would keep her from coughing all night.
"You've got to be kidding me," I said, suspecting that with the act of anointing her daughter's feet with camphor and eucalyptus, Jennifer was secretly initiating me into her coven of Kentucky goblin witchcraft. "Her feet? This works?"
"I shit you not," said Jennifer.
So I risked my eternal soul and did her nefarious bidding, and it did work. Sophie didn't make a peep all night. A child sleeping through the night without being drowned in Triaminic? What madness this was!
No, I'd figured out a while back that rubbing that stuff on Jackson's chest was way easier than waking him up (how can sleeping children cough and yet also sleep?) and forcing a dose of candy-flavored syrup down his throat. But I liked the feet thing because it GAVE ME IDEAS.
I remembered I had a tube of lavender hand cream in my night stand left over from a birthday basket of l'Occitane samples my sister-in-law had sent me a couple of years ago. Instantly, the hamster that powers my cerebral cortex jumped on her little wheel and whiizzz! I had a plan. I put the lotion on its feet! Understand that I'm probably placeborifically sensitive to the calming effects of lavender, but what the hell, I thought, as my feet slowly turned into cloven hooves, maybe it will help me sleep? And it did. That shit works. I put it on my bony appendages every night now and I've had no insomnia ever since. Or rather, I should say that if I do wake up, it's really easy to drift back off to sleep. Unfortunately, once I ran out of my sample I discovered that l'Occitane likes to charge about $20 for a 2.6 oz tube of sweet dreams, but hell, it lasts longer than a bottle of Hornitos, though it's not nearly as delicious with chips and guacamole.
The second time he went to the doctor (the first round of antibiotics was too WEAK) I was actually bundled up on the couch with Jackson, who'd come down with a fever, but I'm pretty sure at that point Jack got in his truck armed with nothing but a broken aspirin bottle and a steely gaze and the truck drove itself to Urgent Care.
Anyway, I shouldn't have been surprised when I woke up on the couch at 3:00 in the morning (Jackson gets super clingy when he's sick so I'd been sleeping on the couch with him and letting Jack bundle up and sweat it out in our bed) my first thought was, "Gee, I haven't felt this bad since I was in labor."
You need no more detail than that, gentle reader. I'm coming through it pretty quickly, which leads me to believe that I just got a half dose while Jack must have felt like someone had catapulted a hippo at him, and which led me to apologize (hoarsely, in a sweaty bath robe, with matted hair) for not having been as nice to him when he was sick as he was being to me. Sometimes I get so self-involved I want to shoot myself. Which, ironically, would only make matters worse.
When I was little my mom would put menthol rub on my chest when I was sick but without telling me exactly how that was going to help. (I think my constant childhood frustration with bad information is what turned me into such a relentless explainer.) Then a month ago Jackson's friend Sophie spent the night and I found that her mom, the brilliant Jennifer, had sent along a jar of vapor rub in Sophie's bag. She asked me to rub it on Sophie's feet and then put some socks on her before she went to sleep and that would keep her from coughing all night.
"You've got to be kidding me," I said, suspecting that with the act of anointing her daughter's feet with camphor and eucalyptus, Jennifer was secretly initiating me into her coven of Kentucky goblin witchcraft. "Her feet? This works?"
"I shit you not," said Jennifer.
So I risked my eternal soul and did her nefarious bidding, and it did work. Sophie didn't make a peep all night. A child sleeping through the night without being drowned in Triaminic? What madness this was!
No, I'd figured out a while back that rubbing that stuff on Jackson's chest was way easier than waking him up (how can sleeping children cough and yet also sleep?) and forcing a dose of candy-flavored syrup down his throat. But I liked the feet thing because it GAVE ME IDEAS.
I remembered I had a tube of lavender hand cream in my night stand left over from a birthday basket of l'Occitane samples my sister-in-law had sent me a couple of years ago. Instantly, the hamster that powers my cerebral cortex jumped on her little wheel and whiizzz! I had a plan. I put the lotion on its feet! Understand that I'm probably placeborifically sensitive to the calming effects of lavender, but what the hell, I thought, as my feet slowly turned into cloven hooves, maybe it will help me sleep? And it did. That shit works. I put it on my bony appendages every night now and I've had no insomnia ever since. Or rather, I should say that if I do wake up, it's really easy to drift back off to sleep. Unfortunately, once I ran out of my sample I discovered that l'Occitane likes to charge about $20 for a 2.6 oz tube of sweet dreams, but hell, it lasts longer than a bottle of Hornitos, though it's not nearly as delicious with chips and guacamole.
32 Comments:
Um, where's your header?
You had l'Occitane samples for two years?! Now THAT'S madness. That stuff is like gold. I think they put crack in it.
That L'Occitane stuff is ultra-potent. If I use it during the daytime, I need to lie down for a nap.
I'd heard that Vapo-Rub on the feet thing before, and thought it was hooey, too. I'm happy to hear from someone whose opinion on such things I trust say it works.
I may try the L'Occitane stuff for my husband. Poor baby hasn't slept well in literally years, but refuses to see a sleep specialist about it. 20 bucks is worth a shot.
Here's some news to blow your skirt up: Chocolate is a better cough suppressant than codeine.
Researchers at Imperial College London found that theobromine, a chemical naturally found in chocolate, is 33% more effective than codeine.
To get enough of the chemical to have an effect on your cough, you need to consume dark chocolate.
So last week you could have been passed out on the couch, surrounded by Green & Black's wrappers.
And guess who told me about this?
My boyfriend. He had me at 'theobromine'.
(NB: That's a link to his article about it, not some weird picture of him.)
Another thing Vicks VapoRub is good for is earaches. You take a wash cloth, dampen it with hot water, rub some Vicks onto the hot damp spot, and have the afflicted lie down with the washcloth under the affected ear, so the vapors travel up and into the ear canal. Swear ta God. It got me through childhood.
I hope you three are all better now. Will any of your cute shoes fit over your now-cloven hooves?
L'Occitane is the shiz. Another thing that will help you sleep at night? Lavender spray for your sheets/pillow. Sounds convoluted and crazy, but I'm telling you, it goes hand in hand with the foot creme. You can get some for around $12 at Bath & Body Works, which if you've ever had a bout of insomnia you'd know that is the steal of the century. Hope you're all feeling much better soon!
Jules
House of Jules
Also, I just discovered the magical coolness of your new header. You awe me.
Oh, I feel you on the whole placebo-ing yourself thing. I drank about ten cups of water with that Airborne stuff in it A DAY when I had a sinus infection this summer, and I swear it helped. Even though Airborne's allegedly been de-bunked. Feh.
Aveda makes Lavendar baby lotion that I use (my kid gets the drugstore pink-bottle junk) at night, and mannn... it's all Calgon-take-me-awayish. And not more than $6.00 a bottle...
my son, who is coughing up a storm, will be enjoying a vapo-rub pedicure before his nap today. thanks for the tip!
When we are sick, I use a drop of eucalyptus essential oil on my nightshirt or pillow, and the same for Charlotte when we are sick. Add Lavender oil and voila! sleepy and breathing.
My mother-in-law told us about the Vapor-rub on the feet thing and like everyone else my initial response was "Get the @#$# out of here! This is actually going to work?" But work it did. Whenever my son had a cough we put that on his feet and put some socks on. Sweet sweet quiet throughout the night.
http://northjerseydad.blogspot.com
I've never heard of the foor thing either. I'll definitely give it a go next time...if I remember.
One of my coworkers swears by the Vicks/feet combo too. Glad to hear it works!
(This same coworker also tucks a Bounce dryer sheet in her infant's pants pockets and swears he hasn't been bitten by a mosquito ever.)
Ok, that's it, I've heard of the vapo rub on the feet, the but Lavender is absolutely brilliant, and yes, its for my husband too, who hasn't slept in about 20 years :)
thanks for the tip, hope you all feel better soon.
Wow! Now I'm gonna have to try the lavender/feet thing when I can't sleep.
Just what I needed: another thing to ad to my list of "It's crazy enough to work!"
I wonder: if I get constipated... and put castor oil on my feet.........
Now I can't wait to go to bed!
www.danajoywyzard.blogspot.com
In my house growing up, Vicks was known as love rub, and it went on our chests when we were sick and coughing (which seemed to happen all the time for about a decade), and later, a dollop went in the humidifier. That stuff is pretty powerful, and with the added notion that it was applied with a little extra affection from mom or dad, it made us all feel a little bit better.
Ah, l'Occitane lavender. My fave. Bury me with a bottle. It's worth every penny. Sigh.
I am sad to say my grandmother made me EAT vapor rub when I had a cough. Did not work so much on the cough but I muffled it so she would not come at me with an at home tonsilectomy kit next. Childhood memories...
I'm getin' me sum that l'Occitane right now. Well, you're positively brilliant.
Watch out for them Kentucky witches. They'll gitcha. Then force you to stay for dinner with a selection of fine wines.
i did not read all of the comments, so maybe someone said this already ... but johnson and johnson's calming bedtime lotion with lavender is awesome. i usually buy the target version. my son loves it, too. (he's three)
I used the vicks rub on my daughter's feet last year. It was the only thing that stopped the coughing. Never heard of the chocolate remedy, I'll pretend it's preventitive medicine too. I'm not sick but I think I should go eat some right now.
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I'm off to coat my feet with vodka.
I'll be sure to let you know if it works.
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Vapor-Rub. *shudder*
I cannot breath when I get too hot. Can. Not. Breath.
My mom used to put vick's on my chest and back when I had a cold or cough as a kid. And then make me cover up with blankets. Such acts should be officially classified as torture. No vick's in our house. Ever!
My husband just told me that his Mother eats Vicks. She says just a little bit at bedtime "keeps her throat from getting too dry".
I can't believe I married into this family.
You are a trip! LMAO!
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Keep up the good work!
another strange tip that actually works?!?!? for a really high fever, take beaten egg whites and dip a paper towel in them (like with french toast) and then wrap it around your kid's feet. i covered them in a plastic bag to keep it from getting too messy. i didn't actually think it would work, but her fever started dropping almost instantly - you could feel it moving from her head down to her feet - and within a few hours went from 104 to 99. it was amazing.
So, my Mom used to rub Vicks right under our noses to cut down on coughing during the night. It worked, so I've always used it as an adult. What I can't get myself to try is rubbing it on my feet instead of under my nose. How can that work better? My husband said "why not just rub it on the door knob?".
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