• xmas1969
  • aprons
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  • chicago

I co-wrote a book

called Let's Panic About Babies!

with my friend Alice

whose web site is here

it's somewhat funny

and you can buy it on Amazon

and you can watch the trailer

it was made by Scott and narrated by Orson Welles

Spring is only 88 days away!

Things our storage unit has eaten lately: 1. A box of my...

24th Dec
tinfoil star

Tee Me!

Last minute shoppers! And those who need to give a little gift...

20th Dec
Adam & Eve tee

Enter title here

I’m a person who used to read a great deal, but who...

13th Dec
Enter title here

And I haven’t vacuumed in weeks

One of the jokes in Let’s Panic the book is about how...

03rd Dec

Adios, NaBloPoMo

Without whom this book would not exist.

30th Nov
Jackson, panicking

Lunch and other important topics

What did I just have for lunch? I’ll tell you: it was...

30th Nov
Lunch and other important topics

Survey Says!

The other night a friend and I were talking about how in...

29th Nov
Survey Says!

Just One Nipple!

This is a page from a magazine my mother received when she...

28th Nov
so you can't afford a nurse!

Meanwhile, in the freezer section

When bagels are too round, and not enough like Twinkies.

27th Nov

Normally I’d just post this to Flickr and walk away

Apparently carrots take the masculine article at Whole Foods.

26th Nov


What happens is that you go apple tasting. Apple tasting! Whoever heard...

25th Nov
big fucking bag of apples

Dear homeless folks, sorry about the pie.

Dear Homeless Folks Who’ll Be Considering Eating the Thanksgiving Pies I Constructed;...

24th Nov
pumpkin pie